The questions adolescents are afraid to ask.

If you are a parent, you probably know how curious children can be. Researchers say that a four-year-old may ask up to a hundred questions a day. Why is the sky blue? Where does rain come from? Why do birds fly? Where do babies come from? Children investigate the world through questions.

As they grow older, the number of questions they ask begins to decline. Some studies suggest that by the age of ten, children ask far fewer questions than they did when they were younger. But does curiosity really disappear?

No, it does not.

Children do not stop being curious. They simply learn that some questions are easier to ask than others. As they grow older, they begin to notice that certain topics make adults uncomfortable. Some questions are laughed at, ignored, or dismissed. Slowly, they learn to keep those questions to themselves.

The curiosity does not disappear. It becomes silent.

This is especially true during adolescence. An eighth grader may be going through some of the biggest physical and emotional changes of their life, yet often has the fewest opportunities to talk openly about them.
Why do I feel nervous around boys or girls?

Why do I want to sit next to him or her?

Why do I keep thinking about someone?

Why is my body changing?

Is what I am feeling normal?

Why do I suddenly care so much about what others think of me?

Do I have so much hair in my body? Should I remove it?

These are not strange questions. They are natural questions. Yet many adolescents carry them silently because they are unsure who to ask or whether they are even allowed to ask.

I had many of these questions myself when I was growing up. Looking back, I realize that young people often try to fill gaps in knowledge on their own when adults do not provide answers.

I remember one incident very clearly. I was in high school at the time, and a girl from my neighborhood was studying in Grade Eight. One day, during a casual conversation, she said something that completely surprised me.

She believed that rape was a forced kiss that caused pregnancy. As shocking as that sounds, it was not because she was careless or unintelligent. It was because nobody had ever explained the truth to her. What she knew came from television dramas. In the shows she watched, a man would force himself on a woman and, in the very next scene, she would be pregnant. To her young mind, the connection seemed obvious.

Can we really blame a child for not knowing the truth when nobody has taken the time to explain it?

That conversation stayed with me for years. It revealed something important. When adults avoid difficult conversations, children find answers elsewhere, from television, friends, social media, or rumors. The problem is that those answers are not always correct. The silence around topics such as puberty, relationships, sex, and reproductive health does not make young people's questions disappear. 

Although much has changed since I was a child, conversations about sex, relationships, puberty, and reproductive health are still uncomfortable in many communities. In some parts of Nepal, time seems to have stood still when it comes to sex education. Parents feel awkward. Teachers feel hesitant. Students feel embarrassed.

As a result, many adolescents carry important questions alone.

Recently, a group of eighth graders were invited to ask questions during a session. When they were encouraged to speak aloud, the room remained silent. No one raised a hand.

But when they were given pieces of paper and told they could write their questions anonymously, everything changed. Suddenly, the silence disappeared.

The students had many questions. Questions about their bodies, relationships, emotions, puberty, and growing up. Questions they had been carrying for a long time but had never felt comfortable asking in front of others.

What follows are some of the questions asked by those eighth graders.

Which is the most sensitive organ of a woman?

What should be done while being over bleeding while menstruating?

What is the nervous system? 

What physical change in a male and female during adolescence?

What happen woman during sexual intercourse?

What should be away from negative impacts in our mind?

Safety measures while during pregnancy.

How many testis does male have?

How does the sperm come?

What are ovaries and testes?

How does the baby born on fimale stomach?

How does the fimal have the period?

Why the fimale have the period?

What happen when white water is continuously coming from vagina?

When did the sperm will fall when they meet together?

If the father or other have some disease the what will happen to the baby when they meet together?

If the mother is having a pregnancy then father and mother do sex then what will happen?

Why the nightmare is coming to boys?

What is the most sensitive organ male?

How the sperm and ovary mixed and form baby?

If they not need baby then how they will sex?

What is mean by female breast?

The students were lacking a safe space to ask. Not a single student raised a hand when they were invited to ask questions in front of the class. Yet when they were given a small piece of paper and the chance to remain anonymous, the questions poured out. Questions about their changing bodies, menstruation, pregnancy, relationships, emotions, and the confusing feelings that come with growing up.

What struck  most was how normal these questions were. These were not the questions of troublesome teenagers. They were the questions of young people trying to understand themselves and the world around them. They were the silent questions adolescents carry because adults are often uncomfortable answering them.Perhaps children do not stop asking questions as they grow older. Perhaps they simply learn that some questions are not welcome.

It is hidden in folded pieces of paper, whispered conversations between friends, anonymous question boxes, and sleepless nights spent wondering if what they are experiencing is normal.

If we want young people to make informed decisions, grow into confident adults, and understand their own bodies and emotions, we must create spaces where they can ask questions without fear, shame, or judgment.

Because every question left unanswered becomes an answer sought elsewhere.